Question & Answer Jokes!
Q: Did you hear that Viagra now comes in a nasal spray? A: It's for Dickheads. Q: What's the difference between love, true love and showing off? A: Spit, swallow and blowing bubbles Q: How is a woman like a condom? A: Both of them spend more time in your wallet than on your dick! Q: What's the difference between a Ritz and a lesbian? A: One's a snack cracker. Q: What's the definition of eternity? A: The length of time between when YOU come and SHE leaves. Q: What's the difference between a white gerbil and a brown gerbil? A: The white one got away. Q: What is the difference between a genealogist and a gynaecologist A: A genealogist looks up your family tree, A gynaecologist looks up your family bush! Q: What is the difference between Michael Jackson and a grocery bag? A: One is made of plastic and is dangerous for children to play with... The other is used to carry groceries. Q: What's the difference between a dog and a fox? A: About eight beers. Q: What has a whole bunch of little balls and screws old ladies? A: A bingo machine. Q: What do you call a female turtle? A: A Clitortous. Q: Why did God provide women with more intelligence than cows? A: So they won't step on your feet when you pull their tits! Q: What's the ultimate rejection? A: When you're masturbating and your hand falls asleep. Q: What do Michael Jackson and K-Mart have in common? A: They both have little boy's pants half off. Q: What did the blonde say when she found out she was pregnant? A: "OOOOOOH, I hope it's mine!" Q: What do a cheap hotel and a tight pair of pants have in common? A: No ballroom! Q: Which of the following doesn't belong? A: meat (b) eggs (c) wife (d) blowjob. A: (d) a blowjob because it's possible to beat your meat, your eggs, or your wife, but you can't beat a blowjob. Q: How is a blonde and a pitcher different? A: A blonde doesn't mind when you charge the mound. Q: Why did the feminist cross the road? A: To suck my dick. Q: What's Ronald Reagan's favorite pickup line at the bar? A: Do I come here often? Q: What's long and hard and fucks old people? A: Osteoporosis. Q: How do you piss off Winnie the Pooh? A: Stick two fingers in his honey. Q: How can you tell when your sperm count is running high? A: When your girlfriend has to chew, before swallowing! Q: Did you hear about the Instant lotto game in India? A: You scratch the card and if the dot on the card matches the one on your head you win a convenience store in the US. Q: What's the best form of birth control after 50? A: Nudity. Q: What's the difference between a girlfriend and a wife? A: 45 lbs. Q: What's the difference between a boyfriend and a husband? A: 45 minutes. Q: What's the fastest way to a man's heart? A: Through his chest with a sharp knife. Q: Why are men and parking spaces alike? A: Because all the good ones are taken and the only ones left are disabled. Q: Why do men want to marry virgins? A: They can't stand criticism. Q: What's the difference between a new husband and a new dog? A: After a year, the dog is still excited to see you. Q: What makes men chase women they have no intention of marrying? A: The same urge that makes dogs chase cars they have no intention of driving. Q: What do you call a smart blonde male? A: A golden retriever. Q: Which sexual position produces the ugliest children? A: Ask your Mom. Q: Why did OJ Simpson want to move to West Virginia? A: Everyone has the same DNA. Q: What would you call it when an Italian has one arm shorter than the other? A: A speech impediment. Q: Did you hear about the dyslexic Rabbi? A: He walks around saying "Yo." Q: What's the difference between a Southern zoo, and a Northern zoo? A: A Southern zoo has a description of the animal on the front of the cage, along with a recipe. Q: What's the Cuban National Anthem? A: Row row row your boat. Q: What's the difference between a Northern fairytale and a Southern fairytale? A: A Northern fairytale begins "Once upon a time." A Southern fairytale begins "'Y'all ain't gonna believe this shit."